Sunday, October 17, 2010

Sunday Dinner, October 17, 2010

After several weeks hiatus, I'm back, although I don't have a Sunday Dinner menu to share. I have no idea what I'm doing for Sunday Dinner this week, as per the usual as of late.

Lamar has plans to come home directly after church and eat a sandwich while watching his football games, but I have no idea what my sisters or Jessica, Jason and Emmy are doing for Sunday Dinner. We'll just wing it and decide after church tomorrow afternoon what to do, but more than likely we'll end up eating out somewhere.

For those who may be experiencing withdrawals from not hearing about my menus for so long, for our Saturday Supper this week I fried some pork steaks, fixed some fried potatoes and made Lamar some cream gravy. Maybe not the healthiest of meals, but it sure was good.

On Friday night I grilled some country style pork ribs and yellow squash for our supper, and earlier in the week I made a big pot of homemade cabbage rolls and cooked some jasmine rice to serve with them.

For those of you who've asked about my health and my test results, I'm feeling much better lately, but my tests were inconclusive. They still don't know what's up with the pressure and burning in my neck. They say there are no signs of major blockages or tumors, which is good, but that doesn't explain why I'm still having symptoms. It is much less frequent than it was, so I'm thankful for that.

While Lamar and I were talking about divorce and dealing with a lot of emotional turmoil, I went through a period of depression. I've had mild episodes of depression in the past but took no medications and it passed relatively quickly and with no treatment.

This time I knew I needed some help, so I told my doctor how I was feeling, and she prescribed a very mild antidepressant. I dutifully took a pill each day for 3 days, and by the third day I knew I was in trouble.

For whatever reason, the medication I took made me much worse than I was before I took the meds. I've never felt so bad in my entire life. I was beyond miserable, and I had no interest in anything. I couldn't concentrate to read or do anything on my computer, television had no appeal at all, and I had no interest in food or anything else. Even breathing seemed like an effort.

I knew it was the meds making me feel that way, so after the third day I quit taking them and immediately started improving. If I'd taken them much longer I think I'd have been suicidal. I realize that some people need meds to get better, but that particular one is obviously not a good one for me.

Since Lamar and I made the decision to work on mending our marriage, I've feel better every day. I still have a bad day here and there, but overall I'm pleased to report that I'm doing much better both physically and emotionally.

One lingering after effect of the depression seems to be limited concentration. I haven't been posting on Facebook or here on my blog, and I haven't been able to read much or do much of anything that involves using more than 2 brain cells at a time.

I won't make any promises I may not be able to keep, but I'll try to post more frequently here and on Facebook. I'm very thankful and humbled by all the love and prayers shown to me while I've been going through my illness and rocky time in my marriage.

Your comments here and on Facebook and your emails and messages have touched me more than you'll ever know. There's no way I can respond to each communication, but I do appreciate each one.

Time to get this published and try to get a little sleep. I hope everyone has a blessed Lord's Day. May God meet all your needs and may you have enough to share, dear family and friends.


Milady de Languor said...

How fantastic to hear from you! :D I'm sorry that you're still having some symptoms, but thrilled that there has been a big improvement. Although not as thrilled as you are, I'm sure. ;)

What a shame that you had such a bad experience with the anti-depressant. They really do work miracles when you get the right one, but that's often a case of trial and error.

Just take your time with everything. You've been through a lot, physically and emotionally, and it takes time to recover. One of these days your brain will start firing on all cylinders again, but until then, just be good to yourself and let the natural healing happen. You know that you're loved and that your loyal minions aren't going anywhere. :)

Have a wonderful Sunday, followed by a great week! xxoo

Donna. W said...

Wow, I didn't have a clue as to what was happening in your life! I'm so glad you shared. I've been really concerned about you. I'm saying a prayer for you right now.

Anonymous said...

My Hubby had the exact same reaction to one certain anti-depressant but another kind did very well with. Hope your life gets brighter every day!

As I said in my last comment, I've cooked your Texas Hash this past week...we love that here.

Last night I made my own version of Chicken Pot Pie...and cooking...I be tard of cooking...gonna find a place to sit down and let someone serve me for a change! ;-D

Love ya, gal!♥

Anonymous said...

I hope life continues to improve for you. Just take each day as it comes. I'll be thinking and praying for you.

Lucy Stern said...

Oh Diane, I am so glad that you came here to post... I have been worried about you... I love reading your posts.... I cooked some fried cabbage last week and thought about you immediately... Fraser LOVES you fried cabbage.... Have you ever thought about writing a cookbook of good down home recipes? I know it would be a winner and I'd buy several copies...

I'm glad you are back... Love ya.

amelia said...

I'm so happy to hear you are on the mend! My hubby was put on an anti depressant for his major sleep disorder and had the same symptoms as you!! He was a different man and didn't want to live and that's not who he is at all. The meds say to come off them slowly but he quit cold turkey and improved drastically and was soon back to his old self.

I'm glad you did the same, these chemicals react strangely on some people and we have to be careful.

So happy you are working on your marriage too, that must make you feel better but mostly, just glad that you're OK!!! :)

Karen H. said...

Good Morning Diane. It is so good to see a post from you on here and to read about what has been going on with you. I know, I have been by your Facebook a few times and left a message, but never heard anything back. Did they by any chance say anthing to you about Fibromyalga? I read or heard that you can have that and that it's hard to find it by testing? I just thought of that when reading your post here. Girl, I have suffered with depression myself. Mine started with panic attacks after I had my 2nd child. I'm guessing it was because I didn't have kids until late in life. I had my first one at age 34 and my second one at age 36. I even went to see a Physchatrist and she gave me Zoloft and that messed me up pretty bad and I had a bad reaction to it and then I was in St. Bernard's Behavioral Health thing for several days and seen a new doctor while in there and he put me on a low dosage of Prozac. I've been taking that for quite some time now. I take 1 pill at night before I go to bed. I'm so glad you are doing much better and glad that you and Lamar are working things out. I know me and my hubby have had some ruff times this year as well. Just know that I still think of you and keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Take care my friend and may GOD contintue to Bless you and yours. Hope you have a good week.

Love and Hugs,

Karen H.

boomama said...

Sister and I have missed you! Glad to see you posting again. For what it's worth, I haven't been cooking too much lately, either - just can't seem to get into the fall and winter recipe rotation. :-) Hang in there, friend!

Linda said...

It is so good to hear from you again Diane. I'm so sorry to hear all that you've been going through. I pray that you will continue to get strong and well. You are a precious friend.

Gigi said...

Keeping you in prayer, sweet friend. Some days, it's all about baby steps. And that's okay... xo

Sister said...

Ditto what Boomama said. I'm so happy to hear that things are looking up. We've missed you!

Just Terrific said...

YEAH!!!! I wish that you honestly could know how thrilled I am to hear from you, Dear One! My hubby and son thought I'd won the lottery when I let out a shout when your new post appeared on my screen.

I've been so concerned about you and did worry about depression. I struggle with it, too, sometimes and think that getting help is key. Please don't feel badly about not responding online. Maybe that was the Lord's way of getting the rest of us on our knees for you, lifting up many prayers. Praise His Name!!!! It sounds like they've been answered!

Didn't you say something a few weeks back about Lamar and you having a special.....25??....anniversary in Oct.? Gee, I wish that I could be there to help plan a special day for you. I love special events:)

So glad you're back!

Anonymous said...

THANK YOU for posting. It was so good to hear from you. I, too, have been so concerned about you, praying for you, and missing you terribly. Your blog was such a blessing to me when I was dealing with some health/emotional issues after retiring from many years of teaching. I so appreciate your humor and way with words. I will continue to hold you up in prayer. PS 42:11 "But O my soul, don't be discouraged. Don't be upset. Expect God to act! For I know that I shall again have plenty of reason to praise him for all that he will do. He is my help! He is my God!" Blessings...v from Id.

kkryno said...

How amazing that you made cabbage rolls last week! I made them for our meal Friday night. I must have caught your "vibe."

I'm so happy that you had the urge to do a post. I've been thinkng of you and praying for your recovery and that things would smooth out for you. Don't give up on what you want and so deserve form life, and that is everything good!

Love and hugs to you; Vikki.


tam said...

Thank you....I was so happy to see your post, I missed you terribly. Take your time in coming back. Tam

Lib said...

So glad to see your post.
Glad your feeling better!
Sorry to hear what you've been thru!
Hope each day gets better fot you!

fazzey said...

Diane, Glad you are back and feeling better..Have missed you!!!Faye

Sam said...

It's great to hear from you, Diane. I check back here a lot and not seeing updates from you definitely made me worry.

It sounds like you had a terrifying experience with the antidepressants. I'm so glad you knew to stop taking them and that you've been improving without them. I agree with you that for some people they are necessary and beneficial, but I have certainly heard horror stories about side effects and bad reactions. I'm so glad you are okay.

I am keeping you in my prayers. Of course! :-)

Brenda said...

Hi Diane,
I'm glad to see things beginning to look up for you (and Lamar).
I still haven't been able to get on as much as I used to, thus the clean house!
Have a great week!

Nita in South Carolina said...

I'm so glad you posted because I've been wondering how you are! Glad things are improving for you.

Mountain Mama said...

I'm so glad you are back and doing pretty good. I have missed you. You are still in my prayers.
I visited Jessica's blog earlier and saw the adorable picture of your sweet granddaughter. My goodness she is growing up so fast!!!
God bless you and yours Diane.

Dawn said...

It's good to see you here again and to know that you're improving. You've been through it. I know someone else who's had the same symptoms as you as far as the fuzzy brain thing goes. I hope it improves soon! So glad you and Lamar are working things out.

Do you have an e-mail for v in Idaho? If you do, could you e-mail it to me? Thanks!

Jen said...

I was thinking about you yesterday

glad youre feeling much better
praying for you

so sori the meds didnt agree with you
I think you need to tell the doctor
they might need to be monitored better
imagine if someone without your wisdom kept taking them

So pleased to hear about you and Lamar. I pray our LOrd be in the middle of your marriage working with you both to improve things

LOts of love and prayers
Jen xoxxox

Lakeland Jo said...

Hi Diane.
You are such a source of inspiration and cheerfulness. I love your blog. Have been worried about you even though I have had a few challenges of my own recently. Sorry to hear about your marriage, and health and meds problems. I hope you are leaving it all behind you now and moving into a happier phase. Keep strong lovely lady

Anonymous said...

Great to hear from you again. I'm glad you're feeling better and hope you get completely back in the groove soon. I missed you!

Bev said...

So glad to hear you are feeling better. I'll continue to pray for you as you work through everything.

MightyMom said...

Well thank God!!

I've been so worried about you!!

Anonymous said...

Dear Diane ~~ I am so sorry you have been through so much with your health and theanti-depressants and troubles with your marriage, but happily most are coming good at last.
Inconclusive tests are not helpful
but at least your symptoms are a bit better. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
I came over to wish you a very happy birthday tomorrow. I hope you have a lovely day and enjoy every minute. Take care, Love,

Karen H. said...

Good Morning Diane. Just wanted to come by and wish you a "HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY". Hope you had a good one. Hope all is well with you and yours also. Take care my friend and may GOD continue to BLESS you and yours.

Love and hugs,

Karen H.

Milady de Languor said...

Happy Birthday, dear one! Sorry it's a day late, but I fell asleep before I got here last evening. Ahem. Hope you had a great day yesterday and that it's the start of a wonderful year for you. xxoo

Carole Burant said...

Dearest Diane, so good to have you posting again. I haven't been on as much either but that's because I've been busy redecorating:-) I've had you so much in my mind and am glad to hear that you're feeling better each day and that although you still have symptoms and have a bad day here and there, at least there has been improvement.

Oh yes, tell me about taking meds for depression and finding out they don't agree with you! The same thing happened to me the first time I had to take some and I really thought I was going to die. I could barely even get up, I felt like a zombie and didn't care about anything. There is probably a med that would help you but the trick is to find the right one and the right dosage!!

I'm also so glad to hear that you and Lamar have agreed to work out your problems and keep your marriage going. All the best of luck to both of you on that:-)

All of your meals always sound so delicious. I've never had okra...aren't I deprived?? lol

Much love to you. xoxo

greeneyes said...

Hello Sweet Dear Sister ,
Yes I know FRIEND but I like the SISTER part ;-)
I guess it goes to show that facebook is not the end all it seems , I was wondering what was going on with you so much I emailed J and she sweetly replied (THANKS J)
It seems that I really do not get much time on the net as prior and the mind numbin of facebook /peeking into others lives haha doesnt really give you the real deal . I have to get back to blogging if not writing ,reading ,I miss it and YOU My WONDERFUL Diane .
So sorry to hear that you have been going through so much , our emotions are nothing to sneeze at and doubled with the meds , good LORD ,thank God you were strong and smart enough to realize and were not sucked into that vortex and got off them B4 damage could be done .
Sorry to hear you have been so blue and disconnected but always remember and hold in your heart ,even miles away your loved ones ( ME ME ME ME<LOL)are thinking of you and wishing you well ,and peace of mind :-)
Miss G
Sugar by the plantation for Princess Emmy please xo

Belizegial said...

Hi Diane, just catching up here as I have been missing out on the blogosphre lately. Daily life pressures. Glad to hear that you're doing better. take care

Unknown said...

Diane: It's incredible to see you posting again! As a great friend of mine once told me. "Somnetimes life gets in the way". Please take good care of yourself. We've been blog buds a long time and you are a gem! lol!

Michael :)

Minx's Den said...

I'm still here blogging! hope all is well with you sweet friend! i miss ya! stop by my ol' blog every now and then so that i know you havent fallen off the planet! love and hugs all the way from nebraska!


Dick said...

I see that you haven't been posting here very often but I sure can't say anything as I haven't been doing so either on my blog. I finally did get pictures posted of the lighthouse at Newport, Oregon from our trip to the Oregon Coast last May. How is that for being late?

I am glad that you and Lamar have decided to work at making your marriage work. It is wonderful that you can do that. When I lost Annie to death there was no chance of bringing it back. But, I was also very lucky to find Pat. While my life sure is different from what it was, there now is more to live for.

I have not gotten into Facebook and probably won't. I've heard too many scare stories about ID theft, etc. that originated there and I'd rather avoid that. But my kids keep pushing me to try it. Maybe I'll post more often on my blog but I'm not making any promises about that.

kansasrose said...

Hi hon,

I came here hoping to see some better news about YOU, and see that the date is Oct 17, and rejoice that your life is getting better from this post. I am going to trust the Lord that you are on the mend dear lady, that the Savior has stepped in and is shorin' ya up, carrying your burdens on His shoulders. You need this time to heal, and that depression beast is an energy sapper for sure. That depression beast can be hauled off and kicked to the curb!!! Hon, the right med, a good doc, and the Lord....keeps the black dog from comin back. You are on the right track. Most of all the Lord is the Great Healer! You are loved much and prayed on! Take all the time ya need to get well hon, but I surely miss that one of a kind, Texas Hash, okra, beans, skillet cornbread cookin' Arkansas woman with the power of a EF5 Kansas twister in her beautiful green eyes and smile, and a loving Christian heart and soul that are rare jewels indeed in this world. get better soon ok? Love you hon...jen<3

Anonymous said...

miss your post, hope all is well! Karen

Sam said...

Hi Diane. I miss your blog and hope you are doing well. XOXO

Miss G said...

Just Popping me head in to check on you and read "you" , love to hear from you but understand and believe me the 2 brain cell thingy I feel ya , I wonder about the things you mentioned ,and cannot understand why they cannot find out what is happening !!!!
I miss you Diane , really do and I will be here whenever you feel you wanna chat or reconnect or ?????
BSH BSH BSH BSH BSH covered in fairy dust and hug on Little E when you get the chance for me .love you xoxoxooxox

Sam said...

I really miss your blog, Diane. But more importantly, I hope you and your family are doing well and that your health is good. Love and prayers to you!


Anonymous said...

Miss your posts. Hope all is well.

Nancy said...

Hello, my dear friend! Don't faint now, but I am back! Did a new post last night! Just a short one, but, at least, it's a start! LOL

I do sincerely hope your life has gotten better! I know what you're going through...I've been there...I even tried suicide. No one can understand unless they've gone through it. But I was a fool and divorced my man! Now it's a lonely life, plus I HAVE to work now.

I miss our Farm Town harvesting nights! You can add me back on FB, as I don't do many pet posts anymore. I ended up with a lot more cats, and I can't take any more, so I am dropping out of rescue for awhile. I never get to see your FB posts so don't know what the latest is with you. Email me your phone number again, and we'll chat sometime soon!

I think about you often, Diane, and always send a little prayer out for you to be well and happy again. Life is too short to live it in a sad and depressing way. My cats are my life now, and they keep me verrry busy these days! They are the wind beneath my wings these days! LOL

Love you and sending hugs your way!!! Kisses for Emily!!! Bet she is getting big now!!! You are so blessed! ;-)

Unknown said...

Happy New Year, Diane! Are you keeping the blog?

Nancy said...

WHAT? You're not blogging anymore??? I am trying to get back into it myself and am checking to see who is still blogging.

Hope all is well there with you, sweet friend....


Elis Irish said...

After read some of your articles, I know you are a very warm mother..
God bless you always..