Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Let Us Ramble, Shall We?

Have you ever had something kind of nag at you? It's not anything world changing or really even all that significant in the grand scheme of things, but you're just not content with the situation?

And is that vague enough for you?

Let's take a trip back to Spring of 2007. Sometime in April 2007, if my memory serves me well, and there's a really, REALLY good chance that it doesn't, our shower head developed an annoying quirk.

(Admit it -- you really didn't see the shower head thing coming, now did you? I'll bet you thought this story was going to be about something significant, even though I already warned you that it wasn't!)

Back to the shower head and its annoying new habit. It started out with a little trickle of water around the threads where it screwed onto the pipe. Nothing much, just a little trickle. A little trickle, a little annoying, nothing more.

Since I'm the handy ma'am around Diane's Place I was the one who'd installed the shower head in the first place so I knew I'd be the one who would have to fix the trickle. Eventually. When it bugged me enough that I couldn't stand it anymore. But for the moment it was just a trickle.

Warning, rabbit chase commencing: I dearly love my hubby and he has many gifts and talents, but anything related to home repairs and upkeep or electronics is beyond the realm of his understanding, much like my understanding of nuclear physics and where that one lone sock from the laundry always goes to hide.

Rabbit chased, back to the topic at hand.

I do most simple home repairs and maintenance, including replacing our simple shower head with a combination stationary/hand held shower head some 8 or 9 years earlier. Clearly the shower head had given us the best years of its life and served us well, and my first diagnosis was that more than likely over the years of use the shower head had just gotten loose and needed to be tightened back up or needed the Teflon tape reapplied.

I was wrong.

Over the course of a week the trickle progressed from a, well, trickle, to a stream of water shooting at a 90 degree angle up toward the ceiling. Not only did that reduce the water pressure from the shower head to practically nil, it also had an irritating habit of splashing down right in my eyes whenever I faced the shower head to rinse my face and my front.

The day of reckoning had come and I dragged out my tool box and set about either fixing the problem or tearing it up for real. In my experience there's always a 50/50 chance of success or failure under those circumstances.

It didn't take long to isolate the problem. As soon as I grasped the collar of the shower head where it threaded onto the shower arm, it fell off in my hand, leaving just the threaded collar on the shower arm. The plastic had broken all the way around the collar and there was no way to repair it.

Houston, we have a problem.

Now, I don't know about you, but I don't generally keep a spare shower head laying around just in case the old one should, oh, I don't know --- break off the pipe and fall off in my hand!

So now I faced a dilemma. Well, probably not a dilemma to most other people. My husband and I are both disabled and it's very difficult for us to get in and out of the bathtub, especially to take a real live, honest to Pete bath, so 99.99% of the time we shower instead of taking a bath.

Fortunately my hubby and I had just showered right before I operated on the shower head, but in another day or two we'd more than likely need to bathe again. I mean, really.

My hubby had already arranged to ride to Jonesboro with his Mom and step Dad that afternoon, and unbeknownst to me, he took a check from our checkbook with him. I don't remember now where I was or what I was doing, but I didn't go with them for some reason.

Apparently hubby was feeling a little anxious about not being able to take a shower until I could get to town and buy a new shower head to install so he decided to do some shopping on his own.

He brought in a new shower head and I installed it with no problems. It didn't even leak the first time I tried it out, which is a little unusual. Most of the time they leak a little and have to be tightened a little more or have more Teflon tape to make the fit water tight.

But.....and here's where that thing I mentioned in the very first paragraph comes in. Remember way back at the beginning of this when I asked if you'd ever had something nag at you? Something that wasn't all that important, really, but just didn't work for you?

Well, hallelujah, I'm finally getting around to that whole point! I'll bet you're thinking, "It's about dang time!"

Our old shower head, the one that broke off the shower arm, had a water saver button on it. You could leave the water on at the temperature setting you liked and turn a button, and the water would slow to a little trickle.

I liked that because when I shaved my legs in the shower I could turn the water down and have enough water to clean my razor between swipes, but I didn't use up all my hot water, so I had enough hot water after shaving my legs to finish my shower at a comfortable water temperature. Just flip the button back to full flow and resume your shower as usual at the temperature you'd left it set on.

Our new shower head has 6 settings on it, from a fine mist to a massaging spray to a pulsing jet and so on. doesn't have a water saver button, and I miss that so much! All those settings are all well and good, but I would trade most of them for a water saver button.

As I said way back at the top of this post, if you can remember way back there, this shower head is only a little over a year old. I've thought about buying a new shower head with a water saver button and replacing the one we have now, but I just can't seem to bring myself to do it.

As much as I hate using all my hot water to shave in the shower and then finishing my shower with cold water, I just can't seem to make myself spend the money and replace the old shower head with a new model that has a water saving button, especially when the shower head is still working great.

Adding to the angst is the fact that if I factor in all the hot water I've wasted over the last year or so, the cost of a new shower head with a water saver button would be offset by the money saved on hot water.

Then there's also the fact that if I actually buy a new shower head, I'll also have to install a new shower head.

We're just never happy, are we?On a somewhat related note, and I'm not quite sure why I feel compelled to share this here, I desperately need to shave my legs. Or maybe I should say, I need to bush hog them.

I mean, I really need to shave my legs. As in, if I go too much longer without shaving it'll look like I've got on furry chaps made out of that fun fur stuff they use for crafts and for upholstering '73 model Chevy vans.

I'm not really sure why I've waited so long to shave my legs. I guess I could claim that the reason I've procrastinated so long is because of the shower head not having a water saving button on it so I put off shaving to avoid having to finish my shower in cold water.

However, since the actual temperature here on Monday was 1o3F a cold shower is a reason to celebrate, not an excuse not to shower or shave.

Must put "bush hog legs" on the to-do list.My daughter JESSICA@JESSICA'S WORLD posted this button on her blog and asked her readers to please take the button and pass it on to their readers with this explanation:

"This is how this award originated: Crystal at Memoirs Of A Mommy created this award in honor of the donor that saved Noah's Life. Noah is her son and he had a heart transplant when he was under one month old. He just turned one earlier this month!! Her hopes are that in passing this award around, we are creating more awareness of the importance of organ donation. If you are reading this PLEASE take it to your blog and keep it going!"

I'm passing this on in the spirit in which it was originally offered. If you'd like to keep this going, feel free to take it and award it to any or all of your readers as you choose.I think I've bored everyone quite enough with my ramblings today. That's if you're still here after that revolting and perhaps alarming bit about my hairy legs.

Here's wishing everyone a great Wednesday and remainder of your week. May God bless you by meeting all your needs, and may you have enough to share.


Lib said...

I do hope the nagging feeling has left, and hope your legs are nice and smooth from agood
Hope ya'll are having a great wk.
L,H,B, Lib

Nancy said...

You are hilarious!!! Maybe you need to get some Nair. Do they even make that stuff anymore? LOL Let the hair grow and turn your heat down this winter...that way you can save even more to put toward that new shower head with a water saver button. LOL

You made me laugh already today!!!

(((((( HUGS ))))))

Mim said...

Now you are too funny!
can you come over an install a handheld shower fixture for me?
Wow I am impressed.. I have no clue about that kind of thing!

Morning Glory said...

I just stopped by to say hi and have enjoyed a marvelous laugh! Glad to find you in such humorous form!!

Sammy said...


Only you could take a story about a shower head and turn it into something so hilarious and engaging! I had no idea where this was going to end up! I love it!

And 103 degrees??? Are you serious?? My word, around here it's in the 90's and humid, and I'm just miserable. If it was 103, I'd move! To Alaska!! :-)

Have a great day! Stay cool!


Jess said...

What people don't realize is that you aren't kidding about the bush-hogging! lol...and let's just be honest here....who likes to shave their legs? I don't,but I do enjoy smooth legs.

I would be careful now....that shower head you have now probably will start leaking since you riped about the water-saver button.. that's how it works right... lol

Thanks for passing the award and message on.

Love you, Jess

Linds said...

See - randomness is just fine! I know the feeling of no logic and plenty of common sense. Today I got a box of energy saver light bulbs in the post from my utility company. To save money. And I can't bring myself to replace the ordinary ones until they blow!
You do make me laugh, my friend!

tam said...

Oh my, Miss Diane! That was the funniest thing you have ever written. You have had some funny post before, but this one takes the cake. Tam

PEA said...

Well, my goodness girl, you made me spit out my ice tea when I got to the "bush hog legs" part! ROFL Oh Diane, I'm telling you, you are the best when it comes to telling a story! lol I'll never look at my shower head the same way again, after your story!! hehe

Ummmm, you'll probably notice by your site meter that I've been here a while...well, I haven't see, I loaded up your page and then went to get a drink of ice tea but got distracted, ended up outside deadheading flowers and talking to my neighbour! lol xoxo

Our Home Schooler and Jen said...

LOVE the title of this post

if its been annoying this long id do something about it
maybe you can put the present one away and have it as a spare or try to sell it?


Dawn said...

Too too funny! Made me laugh on a very sad day for our church.

Susie said...

Hi Diane,
This has to be one of your more humorous posts. Bill heard me giggling and had to find out what was so funny.

BigDadGib said...

I need to study more about this "shower" thing...
What a concept... LOL

There is never a dull moment in your house, is there? lol

Hove and Lugs,

MightyMom said...

SOOO, bush hog'd those legs yet??


mine could stand to see a hay bailer actually....might just do that sometime here soon

I have an idear for yah, replace the shower head, relish in the money and hot water you save and then KEEP the current one in a drawer somewhere "safe" so that when the next one breaks off in your hand you HAVE A SPARE!!

(Just what every house needs!)

love ya

Michael Manning said...

Hey, Diane! I had my "Larry King" style you have one that's even cooler. I died laughing right about the time I got to "Houston, we have a problem" and I could see you in my mind's eye with that toolbox!

Have a cool weekend, Diane! Here, it's freeze inside/pizza oven outside! :D) lol!!!!!!!

Aunt Jenny said...

103...ugh! I am not complaining about our 94 today in your honor..I repeat UGH..that is too dang hot!!
I loved your shower head story!
And guess what..I bet today my hairy legs could give yours a run for their money..I love the bush hog idea! Haha
You crack me up!!

Jeanette said...

Gday Dianne
Oh you gave me a good laugh today, just loved your story, No I dont keep a spare shower hear either LOL' But mines leaking can you come over and fix it please...

Mary said...


Your post was not boring. In fact it gave me a good chuckle this morning. Thanks for brightening my day. You always look at things so humorously and with a very positive attitude.

My opinion on the water save shower head is that you will probably save the cost of it because of the water savings. Go for it! You deserve to be able to shave your legs in tranquil contentment.

Have a wonderful day, my friend.

Jo said...

First of all I am thrilled beyond belief that the dumb Norton is actually letting me into your blog today. No problem at all.. I just know that while we are sleeping these computers are staying up over night just thinking of new ways to be an aggrevation to us.
Thank you for sending me your latest posting yesterday...You are a true friend in deed.

I loved this post. You give just enough information to keep me hanging on to see what is going to happen next. You need to write a mystery novel.

I am going to hop off of here and get ready to take Riley to town so he can play at the park awhile. Then we will do lunch and come home, perhaps tired enough to take a nap..... :o) That's my plan anyway. I'm sure Riley's plan is a different one.

Betty said...

Hi Diane,

This is what I do when my legs need shaving. I always sit on the side of the tub and shave my legs before I ever start my shower. I leave the water running just to a trickle to rinse my razor after each swipe of my legs. That way I get my shaving over with and can get on with my shower without running out of hot water.

Just a suggest. Anything to save you from having to buy a new shower head and having to install it, lol.

I'm feeling better since it's not so hot here and the humidity is down. I'm glad you are feeling better.

RennyBA said...

I kind of like your ramblings you know and your shower sounds great and I guess environmental good too.

Love the macro picture of the bee!

Wishing you a great rest of the week. Love and hugs from Renny :-)

It's All Good! said...

Hi Diane,
I wish I had the know-how about home repair that you do. My husband is good, but busy, so sometimes things just have to wait a little longer than I'd like. And I don't nag...well, maybe a little!
God bless,

moreofhim said...

ROFL!!!!!! Oh my goodness, Diane! I'm just literally laughing my head off over your unshaved legs. Why? Because mine look the same way! I loved your comment about the fun fur/upholstery look. LOLOL I will never, ever be able to look at my unshaved legs again without thinking of that comment! What a hoot!!

Thanks for the good laugh. I thoroughly enjoyed your nagging feeling story and even the bunny track. Hilarious!

God bless you ~ Julie

Grace Scott said...

You break me up - that is hilarious. This brightened my whole day - thanks for sharing it. What a hoot.


Hootin' Anni said...

roflmao. Diane, Diane.

First off, I do the 'handi-work' around the house here, too. Unless I nag and b*tch a bit to the point where dear Bud feels guilty and then tries to do something which I end up taking over 'cause his hands are so arthritic. LOL...I don't mind. In fact I like to do a bit of dubbing around the house.

But your entry is just plain...a HOOT. This could so be me!!

And as for shaving my legs. I've been tempted to NOT shave and just end up braiding them what a style trend that'd be. Catchy, don't you think?

You say:

"The day of reckoning had come and I dragged out my tool box and set about either fixing the problem or tearing it up for real. In my experience there's always a 50/50 chance of success or failure under those circumstances." I CAN SO PICTURE THIS WITH ME IN YOUR SHOES!!

[take a small plastic bowl of water in the shower stall with you for 'swishing' your razor around to rid of the hairs!!]

LOVED THIS POST...and I thank you for stopping by and visiting and your comforting words and thoughts.

TorAa said...

Yezz, I'm sooooo booored.LOL.

Hillrious story. I think I'll have a shower, even though it's only 86 F here at RennyBA's place in Mariestad, where Anna and I are on visit.

Mississippi Songbird said...

I love this post and I'm passing the button on too.. Have a wonderful weekend!

DianeCA said...

My condolences on the loss of your water saving optional ...and apparently removable shower head! Congratulations on your new complicated multi setting shower head...and a brilliantly funny story. You are a great storyteller :-)

Lucy Stern said...

I didn't know you could get one with a water saver button....It sounds great. TF bought me a new shower hear, as requested, for Christmas last year....I love it. It has a stationary head and it has a hand wand too. I like the fact that I can use full power while showering and then take the hand wand and get the spots that are hard to get.....Good luck shaving off all of that hair.

FYI: I tried to come to your blog earlier in the week and our Norton Anti-Virus wouldn't let me read you....Today, I tried it again, and here I am....I'm puzzled.

Lesa said...

Oh Diane - you are such a hoot! Only you could create a wonderful post about your shower head!!
Stay cool and take plenty of showers this week! It's gonna get hot!!

Jeana said...

"Houston we have a problem." HAH! Too funny.

I can totally relate to your dilemma. And now you're expecting some specific story about why I can relate, and I don't have a story. But I can see myself going back and forth over something like that.

Jan/ said...

I love reading your blog, because we speak the same language--southern. I think you should go on and replace the shower head and keep this one for a spare, just in case the new one disentigrates in your hand. We shower every day, and anything we do that often should be as convenient and pleasurable as possible, in my opinion.